We suffer more often in imagination than in reality. – Seneca
What does it mean to suffer in our imagination?
When you start asking “what if…” with bad outcomes in mind, you are suffering in your imagination, instead of in reality.
But, it’s good to be prepared, right? It’s good to expect the worst and hope for the best? Why would this imaginary suffering be anything except a good tool for optimal survival?
Keeping our minds focused on negative outcomes and constantly worrying about what we would do should those outcomes occur leaves little room for anything positive. It can make us entirely cynical. It can ruin our relationships. It can leave us feeling nothing but fear throughout our entire lives.
Imaginary suffering has its place, such as in negative visualization, where you follow your fears where they lead you, to think through and reframe the reasons for your worries. But, it’s not good for our minds to do this all the time, 24/7, without ceasing.
In reality, most of the things we worry about, and most of the things we fear, will never become real problems. You’re going to die someday, and there is no way to avoid that. You can waste your life away when you focus on avoiding that fact. Once you come to grips with that big truth, most other things matter much less.
Your imagination will always be wilder than reality, whether in a good or bad way. Remember to breathe, to take moments as they come, knowing that you can and will be alright on the other side of things. Suffering is inevitable. Use that energy on the sufferings and situations that matter most.
Buy me a coffee, if you feel so inclined!